Relationship SP-client

[urquell]

No

Maybe its not party atmosphere as stripper but the same kinda drugs strippers take sps do as well. Maybe not all but alot

it's a different atmosphere, and the hours are different etc. It's all very different, honestly. It's not just about taking the drugs (the girls I date don't) but about the pervasive atmosphere and associations that come with the environment and the general lifestyle

 

[LeDodo]

It can be challenging for a man who has the opportunity to develop a friendship with a woman he used to see as a regular client. The constant desire to be intimate with her may make it difficult for him to refrain from returning as a client. Similarly, for her, it may be hard to be intimate with someone who was once a client but is no longer in that role.


There seem to be two different dynamics at play: one person may seek reassurance and connection through physical intimacy, while the other may need reassurance and a mental or emotional connection first, which can take more time to develop. This difference in timing might lead the man to revert to being a client.


Sometimes, it feels simpler to remain just a client, as it avoids disappointment on both sides.

What do you think?

In the first place there was something that attracted you to the person and you have that eagerness to know more. I find it challenging to try develop an emotional connection as you don't know how deep it can go or much you would know. In the process you'll walk on blurred lines and it requires a lot of emotional intelligence to respect her boundaries and maybe yours.

 

[Lunaseraphim]

I would, and have, with 3 different women. I would have married one of the ladies but we broke up not due to personal issues but rather to complications tied to immigration. We're still friends to this day. The work was never an issue for me and I've never been the jealous or possessive type, and we were pretty open about physicality. The "intimate" part for me is never about sex, although certainly sex is heightened with intimacy. I've never really understood why people choose to call it "being intimate" as opposed to "being physical" . I make a clear distinction between the two, but maybe that's just me.

Now, dating a stripper on the other hand, is a different proposition. I found dating a stripper to be far more invasive and frustrating than dating an SP. due in large part to the inability to fully control the atmosphere, or the clientele or the hours, as well as the culture (especially the drugs) that exists among the girls working in the clubs. I would far rather date an SP than a stripper. In fact, I would never date a stripper again, at least not while she's working as a stripper.

That's really interesting.. I love that you can make the distinction between being intimate and being physical. Thank you for sharing! I think being a stripper seems to be a really hard job.. They work late hours. I find it difficult to date people in the night life scene too..

 

[jeffmathers]

I spent the whole day helping a provider who doesn't live in Montreal (or even this province) move. Met her boyfriend also. I met this provider 3 years ago and we had a lot in common. Went with her boyfriend to the dump and hung out with him afterwards at her place. I felt like I met another me sort of it was so fun to meet someone with so much in common with me. I feel happy for them that they have each other and I wish more providers who are looking for a significant other had someone like him. There is an emptiness to simply being physical with someone but to truly know someone at a deep level mentally and live at the same place as them seems magical. He was not a former client though.

It's always beautiful to see genuine love and people saying they love each other. I wish the SPs who think they'll never find love knew that they can find love. It's not easy but it's possible. Maybe more of a feel good story if mentioned that the provider doesn't conform to any traditional beauty standards (she isn't self conscious about it) yet has still found love. I don't know if there is a way to convince people who already conform to traditional beauty standards that their appearance isn't holding them back.

I get that it's mildly off topic but I daydream about the stigma providers face and how some things are more easily attainable for femmes who are civilians. It makes sense that a number of providers date other people in the industry as opposed to dating civilians.

Positives of dating someone with SW experience vs someone without it.

SWs are more likely to be similarly neurodivergent to me.

SWs are more likely to accept my large number of people I have had intimacy with.

SWs are more likely to know a person can be a good person and have struggled with dating.

A lot of civilians think being a good person means someone gets a relationship.

SWs are usually better at communicating boundaries than civilians though there are exceptions.

SWs are usually better at conflict de escalation tactics.

 

[EastWind]

Never combine a woman who is willing to eat your ass and the other willing to clean it.

 

[Shaytana]

The madonna-whore complex is rampant around here whew!

 

[jeffmathers]

The madonna-whore complex is rampant around here whew!

I agree. You're Moroccan? Do you have a website. According to Google the text under your name says "Real Moroccan". That's cool I know like 3 words of Arabic.

 

[Miller96]

I don’t comment or post often but almost all of them have been in threads similar to this one. I used to have more posts about this but they’ve been deleted by mods because I shared too much info about myself, obviously it wasn’t on purpose.

In my life, I’ve only had 4 long term relationships and 3 were with women in the business. 2 of them were healthy and loving relationships and of those 2 1 could’ve been my forever if I wasn’t a coward.

Sadly, in that case,she met me at a time in our lives that saw me just starting to get my professional and academic life back in order, after years of bohemian living, travelling the world, not working and overdoing every pleasure that was available to a single, boyish young adult (This was all right before and during COVID as well).
On the other side of the spectrum, she was finally where she wanted to be in her career and thinking about starting a family. I was 22-23 during that time and she was 28 when we met.

She asked me to move to Europe with her when she got a job offer, after almost 2 years of seeing each other, but I got scared since I had just spent almost 3 years bumming around and I wasn't even halfway done with my studies.

Before these women, I had never seen an SP until they told me what they did for work (we met at a friend's party and I became close with a group of SPs). I only started after my last relationship, which was the 1 toxic relationship I’ve had in my life. That girl broke me, and for a bit, I went off the deep end until I started seeing a shrink in January.

This is something I'm trying to figure out with therapy, but I don't think I'm gonna be able to go back to regular dating since I practically never dated before that (fwb or tinder type stuff doesn't count tbh) and haven't since either. I've noticed that this also correlates with that group of girls moving on with their lives or just moving away, and in doing so, I've had no one who can relate to that type of marginality, so to speak.