Bingo.
The fatal flaw in modern sociological thought is believing that humans are infinitely malleable, while we are constrained by the bounds of human nature.
Can a woman and a man be friends?
- Thread starter LeDodo
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The fatal flaw in modern sociological thought is believing that humans are infinitely malleable, while we are constrained by the bounds of human nature.
This question always puzzles me.
Because, for one, of course men and women can be friends. SOME of them aren't able to, but there's no shortage of opposite sex friendships in general.
But also, and hear me out. Unpopular opinion but I personally think being friends isn't incompatible with having sex. I've fucked many of my friends. To me the key word in "friends with benefits" is friends. Lol the only thing is communication is important to establish boundaries and make it clear that this isn't turning into a relationship.
Because, for one, of course men and women can be friends. SOME of them aren't able to, but there's no shortage of opposite sex friendships in general.
But also, and hear me out. Unpopular opinion but I personally think being friends isn't incompatible with having sex. I've fucked many of my friends. To me the key word in "friends with benefits" is friends. Lol the only thing is communication is important to establish boundaries and make it clear that this isn't turning into a relationship.
I suspect that there may be some selection bias at work here too, as I tend to think that there is a greater percentage of those who are incapable of friendship across genders on this board than would normally be the case in the wider world, for a variety of reasons which would probably be impolitic to discuss here.
I ruined a friendship with my best friend.
We were best friends for 5 years and then I married her.
She became the love of my life for over 35 years until cancer took her.
I have had several female friends over the years and we never slept with each other. Some were from work others were friends of my wife and then became mine also.
So yes you can be friends with a woman.
When you are in your teens and early twenties it happens less as then you tend to seek out women for their looks first and potential sex partners rather than ones you want to start a friendship with, but even then I remember having girls as friends who I was never interested in sleeping with or them with me.
We were best friends for 5 years and then I married her.
She became the love of my life for over 35 years until cancer took her.
I have had several female friends over the years and we never slept with each other. Some were from work others were friends of my wife and then became mine also.
So yes you can be friends with a woman.
When you are in your teens and early twenties it happens less as then you tend to seek out women for their looks first and potential sex partners rather than ones you want to start a friendship with, but even then I remember having girls as friends who I was never interested in sleeping with or them with me.
I definitely should have had you as a friend when I was young
Is there a reason why one side or the other can't find the other attractive (and/or would have sex with them under the right circumstances) and them still be friends? Just because we have attraction doesn't mean we need (or get to) act on it. I have many female friends (or partners/friends of friends) I think are hot but I'm not trying to, or even hoping to necessarily, sleep or have a relationship with them.
The FWB notwithstanding, there's also friends you may have sexual tension with (that never gets acted upon), friends who are naturally flirty but in relationships, friends who are attracted to the same sex (that you might find attractive), etc. They're all still friends and sex or a trad relationship may never materialize but that isn't the core of your friendship anyway.
The FWB notwithstanding, there's also friends you may have sexual tension with (that never gets acted upon), friends who are naturally flirty but in relationships, friends who are attracted to the same sex (that you might find attractive), etc. They're all still friends and sex or a trad relationship may never materialize but that isn't the core of your friendship anyway.
I find this question absurd. I have plenty of male friends that I don't have sex with. I even had a male friend, and at a certain point we decided to have sex, then mutually agreed that we have no sexual chemistry, and then we continued to be friends without benefits. No big deal.
yeah I considered mentioning that too but I'm tired and want to watch a 90s cop show instead.
it's time for true crime lolyeah I considered mentioning that too but I'm tired and want to watch a 90s cop show instead.
Even if this is an eternal question I originally had a thought about a specific context. Maybe I should have omitted the poll that made the thread too generic.
I also have friends who are women and it's just friendship.
For some I used to have regular meal-catchup. I have an ex colleague with who we had a very chemistry and could instantly know what the other is going to say or think. In both case it could have be confusing how close we were especially for our level of tchitchatting or people would have thought I was homosexual.
But coming back to my OP what could have marked the end of the friendship might have been the rejection that created a feeling tending towards that behavior.
I also have friends who are women and it's just friendship.
For some I used to have regular meal-catchup. I have an ex colleague with who we had a very chemistry and could instantly know what the other is going to say or think. In both case it could have be confusing how close we were especially for our level of tchitchatting or people would have thought I was homosexual.
But coming back to my OP what could have marked the end of the friendship might have been the rejection that created a feeling tending towards that behavior.
The situation you're bringing up is specific.. and honestly, it has happened that I lost a friend who was another woman for the same reason. Sometimes the rejection hurts too much.. other times, someone is just not emotionally mature enough to get past a superficial crush.
It reminds me of a girl I was in love with in secondary.
Even though she rejected me, she had the courage to tell me personally instead of the awkward situation that you know it's not going to happen but nothing is said.
I was really moved about her honesty as in she acknowledged my feelings but couldn't be the person to accept it.
In secondary school we are still kids.. as adults things are way different. Or I would think so.
Some people yes, some people no. I feel like from this thread that more women woudl be open to such a friendship and less men. For me, my life would be impoverished if i didn't have women friends. Sure I have had crushes on a few over the years but I just kept that to myself because I valued the friendship.
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I have male friends, but I'm not thinking damn that ass looks fine. With a woman who is attractive I do, add a bit of alcohol to it and it is game over.
I have never been friends with women the way I have been friends with men.
I don't even understand the dynamic of it, why would I even be friends with a woman? I have a friend, great seducer he has a lot of female friends but he likes to have them around as a bit of an ego boost and some sort of flatery. At one point he was in a table with 3 women he was friends with and they started to talk about the size of his dick. I don't care or need any of that.
I do have 4 women I regularly exchange with, but I had sex with all of them. I don't understand the status of that said relationship but I wouldn't qualify it as friendship, I think it is just killing time or fighting boredom, I wonder what they think if it is friendship or what?
I have never been friends with women the way I have been friends with men.
I don't even understand the dynamic of it, why would I even be friends with a woman? I have a friend, great seducer he has a lot of female friends but he likes to have them around as a bit of an ego boost and some sort of flatery. At one point he was in a table with 3 women he was friends with and they started to talk about the size of his dick. I don't care or need any of that.
I do have 4 women I regularly exchange with, but I had sex with all of them. I don't understand the status of that said relationship but I wouldn't qualify it as friendship, I think it is just killing time or fighting boredom, I wonder what they think if it is friendship or what?
Just like my regular we have many things we can talk about also we have an agreement so it’s friends but it’s primarily for my fetishes!
What's confusing? It's just 2 (or more) people that have common interest or are familiar enough to share personal information, unlike acquaintances. Like any 2 dudes might, but with a way better opportunity to potentially learn something about the other side, or just someone you like to hang out with. I'm confused by your confusion.
Long time ago I had ATF SP. But when I was upgraded from a client to a friend the sex stopped. She said that she does not charge friends, but is not interested in free sex with me
Friendship to me is more intimate than just sharing common interests. That is still an acquaintance to me. After having sex with a woman, friendship is ruined. No attraction is a must for me. If there is attraction it changes the guy behaviour same goes for the women too.
