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Well that's the problem... I think I like some chaos in my life, and I've been scrolling through ads on leoslist and escorte intime, and I realized that a lot of the girls I found interesting seem to have the same look and chaotic lifestyle. I was basically looking for a less abusive and...

Thanks man, you're right and I really appreciate you saying that, it definitely helps processing this whole experience.

A combination of those things. She had a nice face, nice body. Not perfect but really my type in terms of that. but mostly what kept me coming back was the feeling like I wasn't paying for a service. This was a real, raw experience that made me feel more alive. Like I got to be part of this...

In any case, it is helps me cope to think of it as a chemical addiction. When the bad feelings take over I can just tell myself: " This feeling is just a symptom of withdrawal. I'm not actually missing her. I am missing the dopamine hit. What I'm feeling is just a physical symptom of...

Yes I think this is spot on

It went on for about 3 years. I met her some time late 2023.

Trolls aside, thanks to everyone else. I appreciate you guys reading and responding. It's been a huge help in processing what happened. Sharing it and getting feedback is helping me put things into perspective. It was hard for me to realize how fucked up and dangerous the situation was while...

Haha. You don't know me at all or anything about me, so whatever your issue is, it's with yourself. I'm not biting on the rage bait, sorry.

Exploiting? What the actual fuck? I was ALWAYS offering to help her get clean You don't have anywhere close to all the details of the situation. Before you make more of an ass of yourself: I WAS constantly offering to pay for her rehab. She told me she had zero interest. She made her own...

Any female perspectives? Haha. Would be much appreciated.

Haha yeah but we were never dating. Often we would see eachother maybe 3-4 Times a week but we always agreed that we weren't dating. She was never my girlfriend. I appreciate the re-frame... But I feel like being "nicer" than the other dudes is actually what got me burned Haha

Every bit of common sense and every logical, rational bone in my body says to walk away... But none of this ordeal was guided by common sense or logic. The not-rational emotional part of my brain wants me to find some way of salvaging it. We had a good understanding of eachother. I never got...

I'm not worried about my safety. honestly the hard thing for me is just getting over the betrayal and backstabbing. I don't regret my experiences though. I got to experience some high adrenaline things that most people never experience... and I was lucky enough to come out without serious...

No, I didn't give her my primary phone number, I did give her my "extra" number that I use for shady activities lol but I still can't dump that number easily as I use it for a few other things

She knows a lot of general stuff about me but I always left out specifics and I was careful to keep my social media etc. hidden from her. I'm not too worried on that front and she's not very bright or tech savvy and is barely even literate when she's on drugs. I doubt she would be focused or...

Thanks, Yes actually sharing my story on this channel so far has been a huge help for me in mentally coping with the situation. I'm greatful for this outlet. There is NOBODY in my normal day life I could ever talk to about this. I appreciate it a lot.

I'm not sure but I strongly think that she gave it to him. She told him a bunch of stuff about me. She would tell me how he's a psycho and violent etc etc. but then she would be calling him constantly all the time and texting stuff like " I miss U" to him( I shit you not, the day after... he...

Yes hotels or in my car, never at home.

I never intended it to be and I wouldn't say I was " in love" with her by any means. But I did definitely care about her. It felt more like I was betrayed by a close friend, not a love interest. It all happened kind of accidentally. It started out as me thinking I was helping this poor abused...

I'm 38, she's 28... But I was always very careful to hide details like my home address and bank info, she never had any access to that information.