Recent content by Shiver MeTimber

More Redneck Literature A Letter From A Redneck Mother To Her Son Dear Son, I'm writing this slow 'cause I know you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left. Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within twenty miles of home, so we moved. Won't be able to...

Sad news........she was so naturally sensual and erotic. I remember seeing Behind The Green Door on a big screen one steamy night in Hawaii..........even steamier after the show.........whew! Brooke Shields was 11 months old on the Ivory Snow box! So long to a legend!

BBT Answer Ha! I found this excerpt from an interview with BBT about the name of the band on a site called swampland.com Like Steely Dan, exactly. (Laughs) Where did the name come from? Well, the polite way to say it... (Laughing) (Laughing) Uh oh, I was afraid of this. When I...

Irishman Two British businessmen in London were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be new store. As yet, the store wasn't ready, with only a few shelves set up. One said to the other, "I bet any minute now some idiot tourist is going to walk by, put his face to the window, and...

Hygiene First "We Specialize In Hygiene", said the sign at the bread shop. The customer was delighted when she saw the baker pick up her rolls with a pair of tongs and put them in a bag. "Untouched by human hands!", said the baker. "Very good!" said the customer, "but tell me, what...

GT = Get Together though I've heard in Wyoming it's short for Grand Teton :)

Tell The Truth Boss (to the new employee): We are very keen on cleanliness. Did you wipe your feet on the mat as you came in? New employee: Yes, sir. Boss: We are also keen on truthfulness. There is no mat.

The downside is..... it kind of rattles me to think I may not have as many summers left as I've already had! The upside is, albeit a tad larcenous, is that I'm able to pull out my guitar and sing any Beatles song to a nubile lass, saying" I wrote this for you my little rocky mountain canary" :D

Actual Things Said In Court Q: What is the date of birth? A: July fifteenth. Q: What year? A: Every year. Q: This myasthenia gravis - does it affect your memory at all? A: Yes. Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory? A: I forget. Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of...

Letterman was in fine form....but yikes, what happened to JP :eek: Casey Affleck has been filming Joaquin Phoenix since his rap debut at a Vegas club in Jan., where he (JP) walked/fell off stage.He was filming on Letterman that night as well. Supposed to be a documentary on the life and...

Listening To The Voices A doctor had just finished a marathon sex session with one of his patients. He was resting afterward and was feeling a bit guilty because he thought it wasn't really ethical to screw one of his patients. However, a little voice in his head said "Lots of other doctors...

Bad Reader By God RG....I do believe you're spot on! I blame it on those pesky, collapsible reading glasses bought at the dollar store......or...... being the teacher's pet in grade 2 :D Thanks! SMT

Names Paschal Candy-Candie Jesslyn Sunna Zarya Charmel Cierra Passion

Empathy Hi Koenig, Obviously many here can empathize with your situation.....and the stories have a sad ring to them, but it still doesn't fix your unique situation. Have you asked her if she wants to see a marriage counselor/sexologist? If she's hesitant, then that may be part of your...

Opportunist's Tale A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5,000 and feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper. Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"...